Being no stranger to loss, I lost a fourth baby after birth and a mother in the same year, so I understand the pain. How do you know you have overcome the pain of a loved one?. I now realize if you can talk about it without breaking it down, it is likely you have overcome it.
Sudden loss and pain of a young one is far more painful as it is premature and unexpected than that of an elderly person for instance which may have been or seemed inevitable. You may be somewhat prepared. Unfortunate it is but Jesus is the healer.
I was intrigued by the story of an Orca female written in the mail newspaper. Its mother carried its dead offspring for 17 days and each time it fell off she would dive deep to find it and carry it again until it finally let go. It reminded me of the need to pick up my lost baby and just go through mourning. It didn't make sense to anyone but it was a natural process for me. That was the same the Orca dealt with mourning and processing the pain and loss of its offspring. We humans cannot carry our lost offspring physically like an Orca. We however can carry them spiritually positively recalling their memories with us. We take refuge and comfort in the fact that their spirits live on.
When l lost my baby in 2007, I found it necessary to go back to the grave almost every week to just stand there. I just was moved to do so. Like the Orca mother carrying its offspring, I went to the graveside regularly till I finally stopped naturally. Another way, I processed pain was to keep a picture taken at birth in the living room and point it out to anyone who cared to listen till I stopped naturally.
Not to get attention but simply to offload what I had gone through. People would say, take it down but it was a natural way of dealing with the loss. I've learned that it does not take time to mourn naturally, the pain may take longer to heal and surface unexpectedly.
There is nothing anyone born of man can do or say to heal your pain, only Christ can do that, and that is not to say people around you don't matter, their presence will be necessary. But after they are gone, the void needs healing. Who better to turn to Jesus Christ the healer of the pain from loss.
So, do what arises in your spirit to mourn, that may be God's way of helping you through loss.
The Lord will give peace that surpasses all understanding.
The tears of women and loved ones are heavy, we see how Jesus comforted them. When Martha and Mary lost Lazarus, they both dealt with the loss differently. In John:7 -11-17, we see that, Martha runs out to meet Jesus saying, "If you had been here Lazarus would not have died".
Jesus already knew and predicted the death of Lazarus. Even with that knowledge he wept and mourned Lazarus. What more for the totally unexpected loss. Mary says the same thing in the verse regarding the loss of Lazarus. Jesus also wept at that point but told Martha that Lazarus would rise again.
Martha and Mary expected miracles from Jesus, Indeed Jesus is a miracle worker and carrier and Lazarus was raised from the dead into glory. In Luke 7:11-17 we see Jesus had compassion for the mother who lost an only son and raised him. Jesus told her. "weep not".
Our loved ones we have lost may not rise again physically on this earth but by the blood of Jesus, they arise and live on in glory. Mothers at loss believe that, in time the pain of loss will heal. Your weapon is praise and through prayer and worship. Jesus Christ will give you the comfort you need in time but surrender the pain of loss to him.
Woman Arise And Be Healed Writing Speaking Ministries
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